The Clueless

~~Clearly Muddled Blog~~

People seem so comfortable in judging situations that they don’t know anything about. When Josh used to have melt-downs I would see glares and hear the clueless say to one another, “That kid needs a good paddle to his butt”.  These strangers felt empowered to cast their disgust at what they thought they were seeing, because he wasn’t following “normal” rules of behavior.  I’d like to take this moment to gently say to those people, F**k off!

Through blood, sweat, and tears, I’ve raised this boy the best I could.  When I was pregnant with Josh I just wanted a healthy baby boy…and that’s what I got. I didn’t pray for a boy that fit in the way society suggests, and through him I see that that request would have been extremely short sighted anyway.  This boy, with a heart of gold has come here to change the world, one mind at a time. He’s patient, I’m not…see previous paragraph.

When I’m on stage doing stand-up, I’m in my element. I’m kind. I don’t presume to know how audience members should respond to what I have to say.  I don’t know what has happened in their lives that year, or month, week, or day…I just offer an opportunity to laugh, and heal, if they’re ready for it. That understanding on my part is a direct result of knowing and watching Josh. He’s been my teacher, and I’ve been his foul-mouthed student.

Those that judge someone with autism have a long way to go. If that’s you, maybe jump off that tall horse and realize that we are all in this together.  I have a foul-mouth sometimes because that’s easier than feeling the pain of judgment cast upon me and my son. That’s on me. That’s my lesson. Find yours. Figure out why you feel more comfortable insulting and belittling a person with autism and his mom, rather than feeling what’s going on inside. Truly experiencing a person with autism rather than judging them can help you get there. That’s their gift to you.

I’m a mama bear, and Josh is my cub. I protect him, period.  Sometimes people soften and sometimes they don’t, and the judgment comes from strangers and family alike.   To those that choose to be in our lives, I say to you…be kind…lead, follow, or get the f**k off our path. If you don’t know gold when you see it, you’re a fool.

Have you heard the one about the awkward genius with a heart of gold that saved the world, starting with his mom? I’ve got dibs on this one!

Listen to the Podcast: JHA039: Sticks and Stones, Man | https://sonyaking.com/jha039-sticks-and-stones-man